A Strange Blossom
by BetweenBlueLines
Summary: Lavi and Kanda both attend university in Canada. Lavi tries to pretend he doesn't have feelings for his so called best friend, but with each day its getting harder to ignore them. Hiatus for now...
1. Chapter 1

C – H – A – P – T – E – R

O – N – E

I watched with mild panic as the clock ticked its way toward six am. My single eye began to burn and water as I continued to watch without blinking – three minutes, two, one… I groaned as the clock began to ring, jumping around on three legs, the bells rattling madly trying to get my attention. Why had I thought the old fashion alarm clock was a good idea?

Slowly I rolled over, letting my feet hit the icy wooden floor. Clothes from the past week were scattered around among the masses of stacked books that covered my apartment flat. As I made my way to the bathroom, I had to step over (and on) random junk that had fallen out of my pockets – a pair of keys to the car I never drove, coins, credit cards long expired. I slide open the door, wincing at the harsh light – so unnatural after hours of darkness – those so called eco-friendly lights burning my eye. I caught sight of myself in the mirror – quickly looking away and focusing on the sink instead – I didn't want to see what damage three consecutive sleepless nights had done to my face.

The cold water rushed over my fingers, effectively numbing them before I had time to change it too hot. It took a long time before the water finally heated up – not only was the heating system old in the apartment, but I'd forgotten to pay the bill, resulting in the landlord not being overly pleased with me when I'd turned it in a few days late. At least I hadn't been evicted… I quickly splashed the warm water on my face, blindly reaching for the bar of soap. My fingers found it – knocked into the sink, and I spent a moment trying to re-find it - quickly lathering up my hands before washing my face. I pressed the worn hand towel against my face, straightening up as I dried off. Slowly I let my hands fall, exposing my eye to the callous bathroom light again.

My left eye glittered a bright emerald green, the skin around it pale and bruising slightly from lack of sleep. The right eye was hidden by slightly damp bright red-orange hair (which was sticking out every which direction from all the tossing I'd done trying to find a comfortable spot). The sleepy look I had, had caused countless girls to swoon each morning when I reached the university. Thus I – Lavi Bookman Jr. – had been branded somewhat of a skirt chaser (the way I acted did nothing to disprove it) and in some cases I even had men following me around.

I snorted, tossing the towel to the counter. Who was I kidding? If people really knew what was behind my eye – behind the name Lavi Bookman _Junior _– who knew what would happen then. Sometimes I didn't even know who I was, I had a name I could barely live up to. I mean, Junior? That was not me, I couldn't live up to that title, because that would mean I was a copy of a man I'd never met.

A buzzer went off farther in the flat – reminding me I couldn't stand all day staring at my reflection. I grabbed the black eye patch from the counter, quickly brushing my hair way from my right eye so I could tie the patch in place. For a brief moment, the horrible scar was exposed, quickly covered by the patch. Girls found the eye patch mysterious, their minds ran wild making up stories about it, while guys thought it was just _Lavi_ trying to be cool. Of course I'd made it a fashion statement, I'd seen people try to copy it before without ever actually pulling it off without looking like an idiot or a pirate-wanna-be.

I hurried out of the bathroom, nearly tripping over a few books, running to get my morning caffeine fix. As I neared the kitchen (really just through the small living room) the heavenly aroma of fresh coffee filled the air. Ah how I loved waking up to this bliss. I grabbed a cup, pouring the black liquid in, while yanking open the refrigerator, not needing to look where the creamer was (it was always in the same spot). The black swirled around, turning a slightly creamy tan with the added hazelnut cream. Just the right blend of black and flavor.

I took the coffee with me to the living room, where I collapsed on the couch, using my feet to knock mail, books, and random junk off the table. Propping my feet up, I dug around the cushions before I found the remote. The (few years old) TV clicked on, images appearing on the screen before the actual sound did. I raised my eyebrows at the choice – Spanish drama. Lenalee must have been the last one to be in control of the remote – she was always watching some romance drama. Thinking of her, I glanced at the small digital clock perched on the TV. I was startled to find I'd fallen behind by a few minutes; if I didn't hurry and find something to eat soon, I was going to be late.

I jumped up, not forgetting to grab my cup of coffee before I headed back to the kitchen. I opened the fridge, my stomach growling in anticipation of food. However, to my dismay, the selection was very limited. Nothing could be considered breakfast food. Really it was my fault, I had forgotten to restock after Allen and Lenalee had been over the other day. What could I say, I was just going to have to eat at the university before class started. I dumped the last remains of my coffee in the sink, heading back into my bedroom to find something suitable (meaning not crumpled and wrinkled) for the day. I settled on a pair ash gray jeans and a slightly v-neck long sleeved sweater shirt the girls absolutely loved. I found my trusty bandana, finger combing my hair before securing it in place.

When I was finally done going through my morning routine, I grabbed my school bag, quickly checking it had my wallet, cell phone (hopefully charged), keys, homework and textbooks before heading out the door, locking the door behind me. I jogged down the concert stairs, glad I'd chosen the long sleeved shirt as I warmed up my hands in the cold morning air. Waving to a neighbor (who did not look pleased to see my over bright smile), I turned onto the side walk, walking a few blocks down to another apartment complex (much more expensive than the one I lived in), where I was to meat Lenalee, Allen, and…_Kanda._

I spotted Allen first – his brilliant white hair stood out in the lot – then Lenalee. Finally my eyes settled on Kanda. I stopped walking, taking him in, feeling my heart speed up just a bit. My best friend (even if he was forced into the relationship), stood against his car, glare ever present. He had his arms crossed against the dark navy jacket Lenalee had gotten him for his birthday, fingers tapping in annoyance. Whether it was because I was now 30 seconds late, or because Allen had said something like BaKanda to him, I was about to find out.

"Yu-chan!" I ran over, fixing the goofy smile onto my face, hiding anything I felt for the samurai-look-a-like. "Good morning!"

Kanda's glare darkened, a dark aura building up behind him. "How many times do I have to fucking tell you?! Don't. Call. Me. That!" I yelped, narrowly dodging his sword, instead glomping Allen. Allen laughed nervously, pushing me away slightly.

"Morning Lavi," he said, returning my smile with one of his innocent ones. I quickly read that this one was genuine and dropped bugging him to turn greet Lenalee. She smiled too, tilting her head in that manner many girls had. However hers wasn't flirtatious as theirs were – we'd but that barrier in place a few years ago, we were just friends and nothing more.

"Tch. Let's get going," Kanda opened the driver's door, obviously not willing to waste any more time then he already had. I quickly called shotgun, taking the seat next to Kanda. Allen and Lenalee climbed into the back, Allen complaining that I always got the front.

"Why would you want to sit next to Yu-chan?" I deemed it safe to call Kanda by his first name since he was driving. He swore, taking one hand off the wheel to hit me in the back of the head, causing me to whine and the others to chuckle. Every morning, I always got hit in the head by Kanda for some reason – most the time it was me calling him Yu. "Aw, is Yu grumpy?" I settled back in my seat, grinning like a maniac as I teased him. Kanda glowered, his jaw visibly clenching. I ignored the way my heart slightly tightened at his obvious anger – I knew I could easily make it so that I wasn't at the receiving end of it but...

Kanda made it in record time to the high school both Allen and Lenalee went to – the two of them being seniors this year. He didn't wait to see if they made it through the gate, before peeling off.

"Yu-" I started to say, clutching the side of the seat and door.

"Don't say my name," he snapped, driving the last two blocks to the university. I glanced at him out of the corner of my eye.

"Kanda," I watched as his eyes widen slightly. "Slow down." The effect was almost instant. Kanda did indeed slow down, though he gave me an odd look when he thought I wasn't looking. Probably wondering what had possessed me to call him by his last name.

Kanda parked in his customary place – right in front of the university. No one dared touch his spot, the last time someone had, they had to call someone to come pick up their car and tow it away. There were times when just as a joke I wanted to spray paint "Yu Kanda's Spot. DO NOT TOUCH!" but would have to pay fees for defacing school property. Kanda turned off the car, pausing to pinch the bridge of his nose – a sure sign he had a headache coming – before getting out of the car. I frowned, slightly concerned that Kanda had a headache this early in the morning.

"Yu-chan, wait up!" I jogged after Kanda, digging around in my bag for the few painkillers I had for emergencies. I grabbed the bottle of water sticking out of Kanda's gym bag, handing it to him with the small white pill. He glanced at it, taking it and giving me an almost grateful look. And we reached the main doors.

"Lavi!" I winced inwardly, hating the way Kanda instantly melted from my side, heading around the school to get to the gym, going to practice before 2nd period. A few girls followed in a way they thought was slyly, hoping to get pictures of Kanda practicing shirtless. I had to push away the angry feeling I felt – why did he let _them_ watch, but not _me_?! Wasn't I his best friend?

"Look this way! Lavi!" I fixed a smile onto my face, turning to face the hordes of girls.

"Good morning, good morning. You are all looking _beautiful_," I said, excepting a coffee from one girl. She practically fainted when I said thank you. Pretending to take a sip – the strong smell of caramel hit my nose - I kept walking, giving wining smiles here and there, excepting small tokens. The way they acted it was as if it was Valentine's Day.

I made up an excuse and managed to escape the girls. I sagged against the brick wall; staring off toward the gym where Kanda was no doubt beating his _kahai_ senseless. Scowling, I let my cheerful happy personality drop. There I was going again back to thinking about Kanda – if Gramps knew he'd most likely kick me to China. _Damn it_. I tossed the still full coffee in the trash along with all the gifts I'd received. Honestly half the girls probably had boyfriends, and yet here they were trying to _win_ me.

I pushed off, stomping off toward the gym. Whether Kanda liked it or not, I was going to watch. Shoving open the door I blinked, startled to find only Kanda. There wasn't the normal posse of fan girls, nor his club (I'd lost track which one he had on Tuesdays – Dojo?) members. Kanda stood in the middle of the matted gym, his eyes closed as he stood facing the door, sword raised. In one fluid motion he moved, spinning around, his long black hair flowing out in his ponytail. Carefully, as not to make a sound, I closed the gym door, watching him with a slightly awed look. His movements sped up to a point where his sword disappeared and he started to blur. Was it even possible to move that fast?

Suddenly he stopped, his shoulders heaving as he took deep breaths. "Baka usagi, if you are just going to stand there with that stupid look on your face, leave." I blinked, rubbing the back of my head in a sheepish way.

"Ah so you noticed I was watching?"

"Tch, kind of hard not to, you are so damn annoying."

"Aw Yu…" he spun around, a deadly glint to the end of his sword – which I realized _was not_ the practice one – "you don't need to sound so mean!" I quickly made it sound as if I was using the English term, not his name. He lowered his sword, still glaring, then made his customary "che", walking over to where he'd dumped his gear. I followed him, dropping my bag next to his and sinking down onto the floor. Kanda sat down on the opposite side so that our bags were in between us. A comfortable silence settled around us and I started to relax, letting my head drop back against the wall and my eyelid drooped.

"Say, where is everyone?" I asked, turning my head so that I could look at him with my eye.

"Che. Why do you care?" He paused for a moment, taking another sip of his water, "Sensei sent them out to run laps."

I let my mouth form the "Oh" even though I didn't voice it. I settled back again, closing my eye, the coffee beginning to wear off and sleep catching up. Kanda's clothes rustled as he got up, his sword clanging against the wall. A floor board creaked as he stepped off the wood and onto the mats. I cracked my eye, watching as he took up his position in middle of the room. I noted the way his face was almost peaceful – like the times I'd watched him meditate (before he noticed I was watching).

"Usagi?" I stirred, dimly wondering who was calling me. "Oi, Baka Usagi wake up!" I opened my eyes, blinking blearily at Kanda's sideways face. Wait – sideways?!

"Eh, Yu-chan? Why are you sideways?" I asked, reaching out to touch his face, but like always he slapped my hand away.

"Baka, you fell asleep," he grabbed his gym strap, gave one sharp tug. My lumpy pillow was yanked away, sending my head to meet the hard floor.

"Ow! Yu-chan that hurt!" I whined, sitting up and rubbing the side of my head. Kanda's fist flew out, colliding with the other side of my head, giving it a matching bruise.

"Stop calling me that! And stop with the ~chan too!" he swung his bag up onto his shoulder, walking toward the locker room.

"Aw, you know Yu like it!" I called after him, making a bad joke with his name. In return, I got the finger.

My smile faded when the locker door slammed behind him. Sighing, I rubbed my head, feeling the growing lumps. Even though Kanda hadn't hit me as hard as he could it still _hurt_. I continued to sit on the gym floor, counting the wooden panels, until the bell rang. Slowly, I got to my feet, stretching out my cramped muscles. The 40 minute nap hadn't done much , unless you counted making me even more tired. Maybe I could sleep through some of my classes and lunch…

"Lavi, would you like to grab something to eat with us?" A group of girls stood next to my table in the library – all tugging low cut shirts lower and batting heavily mascara eyelashes. I rubbed the back of my head, wincing as I touched one of the sore spots.

"Sorry ladies, I'd really love to, but I have a report to finish…" I trailed off giving them an apologetic smile, while gathering up my gear. All of them offered to help, but I turned them down, saying I need space and quiet.

They whined, saying they'd would be good help. I just continued to smile, giving a half hearted wave as I walked out of the library. The minute the doors closed behind me I started to run, putting as much distance between me and the library. Once I'd judged that they wouldn't be finding me any time soon, I slowed down and changed direction, heading for the door I used to meet up with Kanda.

I wasn't a bit surprised, to find Kanda already in our meeting place under a large tree. However, seeing him laying down, using his bag as his pillow, and his long dark hair loose from its normal high ponytail was a shock. I stood for a moment, admiring the way his face was smooth and deprived of all its usual anger, how the hair framed his face and cascaded around in a beautiful blend of shimmering dark blues and blacks… No matter how long I looked at him I doubted I could ever truly memorize that expression.

"How long are you going to stand there gapping like a fish, Baka?" Kanda sat up slightly, shading his eyes with one hand. The bracelet he wore slide down disappearing into his dark navy blue coat.

"Eh?" I blinked, realizing indeed I had been standing for awhile staring. "Sorry Yu, I got sidetracked."

"Che." He stood up, picking up his bag. "Where too?"

I jumped down the stairs, stretching my arms up and linking them behind my head. "Dunno." I watched him out of the corner of my eye. "I was thinking about taking off for the rest of the day."

Kanda snorted, rolling his eyes. "And you expect me to drive you around?"

I glomped him, "Yu-chan, pretty please? I know this really good Japanese restaurant we could go to! They serve soba." I poked him in the cheek multiple times 'til he shoved me away.

"Che, stupid usagi. Fine, but it better be good."

"Of course it is!" I threw my hands up, spinning around, before I tripped and landed on the ground with a loud "umpf". Kanda glared down at me, not offering his hand to help me up, instead walking past me toward the schools parking lot. "Wait up Yu, don't leave me!" I got up dusting off my jeans.

Kanda continued to walk on, his long black hair swinging around, catching the late fall sunlight. As if reading my thoughts, he pulled it up, securing it in its usual spot. "Coming, baka usagi?" he called, not once looking over his shoulder.

"Yeah I'm coming!" I took a step forward then paused. My heart throbbed slightly, and I brought a shaking hand to my face. Why did it always feel like I was staring at Kanda's back…? Why did it feel like I was always being left behind? Shaking my head, I sped up, fixing the 'smile' onto my face. "Hold up Yu-chan! If I'm not with you, you won't be getting lunch!"  
No I wouldn't think about it now. It didn't matter, it wasn't suppose to hurt. I couldn't care. I shoved the emotions aside, and caught Kanda up in a one arm hug. This is how it was suppose to be – me walking forward with a bright smile on my face. Nothing else mattered.

_ _ _ _ _ _

*Baka: Stupid/Idiot

*Usagi: Rabbit

*Kahai: Underclassman

*Sensei: Teacher

*Chan: A suffix (like Mrs. Mr.) expect used for friends. It's the girl version (example, Sally-chan)

Thank you for reading! ^_^ This is the first fanfiction I've written for this site, so please be kind with your words! I'd appreciate reviews, comments, questions, _anything!_ If you see a mistake please point it out to me so I can fix it! .... And I have no idea what happened in the end, lack of sleep catching up with me too?

Till next time, Blue.


	2. Chapter 2

**A/N:** Hello~

In this chapter we have a lot of Kanda swearing. Also to clarify, Allen and Lenalee are dating (this chapter is set mainly on the date) so to all those Allen x Lenalee haters, I DON'T CARE. Personally I don't really like the pairing, I'd rather have Allen with Kanda or Lavi, but it's better than being with Road. _

And because I forgot to put this in the last chapter: **DISCLAIMER**~ I do not in any way, OWN DGM or ANY of the characters. All I own is one shitty laptop and my messed up brain.

C – H – A – P – T – E – R

T - W - O

**(Kanda POV)**

"…and then Master was all like, 'where were you boy? I needed you last night you little piece of shit!' so I told him, 'I'm sorry Master…'"

I closed my eyes, pressing my fingers to my face. Did the Moyashi have to be so damn loud?! I sighed, looked back down at my uneaten sandwich. Why had I agreed to go with Lenalee and Moyashi on their little 'date'? Oh right because Komui had threatened me into it. Che.

"Kanda isn't that horrible? Mr. Cross was so mean to Allen last night! I should tell brother to have a word with him. Shouldn't I, Kanda? Kanda?!" I looked up, glare firmly in place, though it wasn't as full of malice as the ones I directed at the Moyashi and Usagi were.

"That brat deserved it." I went back to staring at the grainy bread, sneering. How could people eat this piece of shit?

"Kanda!" I winced when Lenalee raised her voice.

"Che, I don't see how it's my fucking business," I answered, tentatively taking a bite of the sandwich. Disgusting. Tasteless, dry yet at the same time unbelievably soggy.

"You should care Kanda! Allen's your friend," I started choking on my mouthful. The Moyashi? Friend?!

"Len-" Allen started to say, looking nervous.

"That baby is not my friend," I set fist down (a little too hard), glaring at Lenalee. Lenalee looked agast.

"Kanda, Allen isn't-"

"Here's your order sir," Lenalee was so lucky she was saved by the waitress bringing over Allen's long awaited food.

"Ah thank you, ma'am," Allen said, giving her that horribly cheesy smile. Lenalee sighed, picking up a fork and stealing some of Allen's chicken pot pie before it was devoured by the black hole.

"I shounk chu ber onze diaft," Allen attempted to say around the club sandwich.

"That's disgusting, Moyashi, don't fucking talk with your mouth open," I picked up a napkin, spreading it across my hand and holding it in front of my face to keep it from being splattered.

"The name's Allen, _Ba_Kanda! And Lenalee, I thought you said you were on a diet?" Allen huffed, getting ready to swallow the second sandwich whole.

She sniffed, taking another bite of the pie. "I am, see?" Allen blinked confused. I had to admit whatever logic Lenalee was working by wasn't getting to us. Watching Allen eat was making me feel sick. If I had soba I'd at least have something to focus on, but _no_ restaurants don't serve soba or anything near that. Homework was out, it was in danger of being peppered by food particles as Allen attempted to keep talking around his food. What the hell happened to being a courteous gentleman?

I turned in my booth chair, staring out the foggy window. Winter was settling in faster than I could ever remember it doing. Only mid fall and parkas were being brought out. I suppressed a sigh, watching the people outside hurry to and fro. Across the street was a little book shop café Lavi constantly drug me too on days like this. Whenever the weather took a nasty turn I found myself being drug to that stuffy place, crammed between piles of books with a nice cup of homemade green tea. I would never tell him but I enjoyed our trips there.

That Baka Usagi… Something was wrong with him. I'd started to notice that his smile was becoming fake whenever I was around, his expression always guarded though he never hesitated to attack me. Dark purple bags were forming under his eyes, though that could be from his waiting till the last second to do his homework. And yesterday he'd called me by my last name – something Lavi never did.

I felt a headache coming from all the complicated thoughts. Yet I couldn't just brush the troublesome thoughts away like I usually did. I couldn't just leave Lavi alone if something really was wrong, that idiot never knew when to ask for help. But it was just like Lavi to be pretending, so just when everyone got all worried he'd yell, 'Joking' and write it off as a prank… I growled, clenching my fist. What did he want me to think? Was I suppose to get worried over his sorry ass or just ignore it?

Something – more like someone – caught my eye in the window. Walking briskly, barely looking as they crossed the street, the person seemed to me in a hurry to get…somewhere. As they drew closer, my frown deepened. With his head down, his shaggy fiery hair fell into his face, hiding the glittering eye and eye patch. His ever present orange scarf was pulled up against the biting cold, covering his nose and mouth. I was about to reach out and tap the glass to get his attention when Lavi turned, opening the door, letting a blast of cold air. He shivered slightly, rubbing his bare hands as he cast a look around the shop.

"Hey guys, sorry I'm late," Lavi marched over, that grin lighting up his face. For a moment I relaxed, he was being genuine and then – "Eh?! Yu-chan too?! Wow Lenalee what did you do to get him to come?" – it froze, the smile and glittering eyes becoming hard. I clenched my jaw, narrowing my eyes as Lavi took the seat next to me.

"I didn't do anything, brother got him to come," Lenalee said smiling happily. Lavi laughed, unwinding his scarf.

"No wonder he's here. 'Ello Allen," Lavi moved on, imitating Allen's accent as he greeted him. Moyashi waved, not pausing in stuffing his face.

"You aren't going to eat that are you, Yu-chan?" Lavi was suddenly leaning forward, his face close to mine. I blinked, all my thoughts about how to get Lavi to fess up halted.

"Tch no. Take it." Lavi grinned, this one somewhat real, as he took my sandwich shoving it in. He ate almost as pig like as Moyashi did. Really maybe I should start calling them both pigs…

I followed a few steps behind Lenalee and Allen. Lavi walked next to me, whistling some overly cheery tune as we pretended not to be with the dating couple. Allen was totally oblivious to Lenalee's irritation, too caught up playing 'gentleman'. And I… was beginning to get bored and cold of walking around.

"Let's go there!" Lenalee suddenly exclaimed, pointing at an inside amusement park. "I bet it will be warm!"

"Man I haven't been to this one forever!" Lavi bounced forward, jumping in between Allen and Lenalee to link arms with them. From my point of few it almost looked as if we were trying to break them up, not supervise. Still glaring at everyone, I followed them to the entry, handing over the entry fee. The three leading idiots looked like kids as their eyes widened, staring at the huge inside roller coasters.

"THAT ONE!" Lenalee yelled, dragging the other two toward a tall contraption with seats all in a row. Whatever it did I didn't want to find out. I wondered over to "Whack – a – Mole", glaring at the rubber black mallet.

"Want to play?" I spared a glance at the man working the booth, "That will be two tickets."

"Tch." I handed him the two blue tickets, picking up the mallet.

"You know the rules right? Well then start!" he pressed some button and a mole popped up right in the middle. At first everything went slow, then at an almost unnoticeable pace began to pick up.

"Che. There." I set the mallet back down, some of my anger released on the stupid moles. If only they had been rabbits or bean sprouts…

"Uh well… Here's your…prize?" the man visibly gulped, taking down a giant fluffy red bunny that was supposed to be cute but instead looked plain ugly. I glared at the man, hoping he was joking. "Or do you want the dog…?"

"Che, I'll take it." I grabbed the rabbit, turning around and stalking away.

"Aw, Yu-chan's got a rabbit! You look so adorable holding that toy!" With one hand I reached for Mugen, swearing under my breath when I remembered I'd left it at home. Now I had to dirty my hands when I killed the Usagi.

"Aren't you suppose to be with Lenalee and Allen? I thought we were watching them?" I growled, hoping that the idiot hadn't lost them. Komui would kill us if his 'precious Lenalee got lost'.

"Oh they are in line. I just don't do well on rides that go up and down really fast," Lavi laughed, scratching the back of his head, "So I figured I'd go see what Yu-chan was doing."

"Really? And why did you think that I'd want your company?" I glared, looking for something I could vent my anger on. That shooting game looked like it could work…

"Because Yu is caring around a big fluffy red bunny-wunny!" Lavi reached forward, poking me in the forehead. _Bunny-wunny?_ My mind did an instant replay. What the hell was that?!

"Hey Yu-chan, come play this with me!" Lavi waved me over, grinning like the baka he was. I sighed, hoisting the bunny up into my arms. Why do stuffed animals have to weigh so fucking much?!

"Are you serious?" I stared at the bright neon words. 'Dance Dance Revolution – the Ultimate'? There was no way I was going to do that.

"Come on Yu-chan, please?" Lavi pouted, clasping his hands under his chin. "Just one round?"

"Tch. Aren't we suppose to be finding Lenalee and Allen? Komui-"

"I won't call Yu Yu-chan!" Lavi begged. I paused, weighing the situation.

"For how long?"

"Today!"

"Che, I think I see Moyashi."

"Tomorrow too!"

"Yeah that's Lenalee…"

"The whole week!"

"Fine. But if you slip up once I'm going to force this fucking rabbit down your throat," I set the rabbit down next to the platform (why was I still carrying it around?) and stepped up, rolling my shoulders in order to get ready.

Lavi quickly went through the controls, that stupid grin fixed on his face. At least it wasn't fake and his eyes were full of happiness not empty. "Baka, don't pick that song-" I glared at Lavi as he picked the one song on the menu I hated…

As the impossible, annoying, beat started Lavi flashed me another grin. "Come on, you are too good at all the other songs. At least give me a chance!"

I glared, tapping the left arrow. "Why would I do that?"

"Because you love me!" Lavi mirrored my movement, and soon both of us were moving quickly in order to keep up. Out of the corner of my eye I watched as people started gathering, Allen and Lenalee cheering in the front. Of course, because Lavi had picked _that _song and on expert we were now center stage; I was so going to kill him after this.

"Whew, I thought I was going to lose this time for sure," Lavi said, wiping his forehead with the back of his hand. Our perfect scores flashed on the screen, before it declared it a tie.

"Che, you would have lost if I wasn't so distracted by people taking pictures." I gave the crowd a furious glare, watching as people hurried off just now remembering where they were supposed to be.

"Aw, you…" I shot a look at Lavi, trying to judge if he was already breaking our contract. "You're just jealous of my amazing skills!"

"Wow Kanda I didn't know you played DDR," Allen piped up, walking over with cotton candy stuck all over his face.

"I don't fucking brat." I ignored their whining and retrieved my coat. Lenalee and Allen went over to Lavi, raving about how well we'd done. Tch, they were all idiots. Allen had said something that caused Lavi to through back his head in mirth, his teeth flashing in the light. I frowned, glaring down at the rabbit. No I was _not_ sulking because Lavi was able to laugh freely with others. I. Was. Not.

I felt the pocket of my jeans vibrate. For a moment I paused in confusion, trying to process what would be causing it. Cell phone. Right.

"What?" I snapped open the phone, not bothering to look who it was.

"Kanda? This is Bookman." I relaxed slightly; it wasn't the idiot old man or the other two. "Is Lavi with you?"

"Yeah," I paused, glancing over at the laughing trio. Why hadn't the Bookman call Lavi's phone.

"That idiot seems to have forgotten his phone again. Could you pass on a message?"

"You don't want to talk to him?" I threw another glance at Lavi.

"No. Just tell him I'll be checking up on his logs." The Bookman's tone stayed the same, curt, monotone, revealing nothing.

"Fine, is that all?" I glared down at the floor, the Usagi's annoying laugh ringing in my ears.

"I suppose. Good by Kanda." With that the Bookman hung up, leaving no room for a reply.

"Who was that?" Lavi jumped on me, flinging his arms around my neck. On instinct I shoved him away with the arm holding the cell phone.

"Bookman." Lavi quickly dropped his arms, taking a hasty step back. Allen and Lenalee had wondered off to a stand selling drinks; no longer interested in us.

"Ah… I guess I left my phone at home then?" He chuckled nervously, patting his pockets. "Oops." The smile had grown to its breaking point. There was no life in his eye, no glint that gave away he was up to something. It was just a dull green front.

"He said he'd be checking on your logs," I said quietly, studding his face. Damn it what was he keeping from me?

Lavi's head snapped up, his eye growing large. "He did?!" Just as quickly as he'd looked he glanced away, turning his back to me. "Heh, should have known he wouldn't stick to the agreed meeting date."

My frown deepened. "La-"

"Oi, Kanda! Lavi! Do you guys want anything to drink?" Stupid Moyashi. Stupid, stupid, stupid, Moyashi.

Lavi ran off to the stand, his expression back to normal. It was as if the little moment between us hadn't even taken place.

"Little moment? Che." I shoved my cell phone back in my pocket, picked up the rabbit and followed after. What was I playing at?

"Ne, I'm full. Komui sure does have a good cook, right?" Lavi glanced at me; his hands linked behind his head in his signature pose.

"Che. I guess." We walked toward my car parked on the curb near the Lee's house. Neither of us said much as I unlocked the car*, getting ready to get in.

"Hey, do you think it will snow soon?" Lavi had paused a few steps away from the car, his head tilted up to look at the dark sky. I glanced up, shivering slightly as the temperature continued to drop. The dark clouds covering the moon looked promising enough, and there was that slight cold taste in the air.

"Who knows? Just get in so we can go." I got in, slamming the door behind me. I didn't wait for Lavi as I started up the car, fiddling with dials. Lavi slid in, closing his door behind him much softer.

"Music?" He asked, reaching toward the radio.

"Tch." I slid my seat belt on, taping my foot against the gas as I impatiently waited for Lavi to settle down.

For awhile the drive was pretty silent save for Lavi's singing (I had to admit when he wasn't drunk he had a pretty good voice) and the low purr of the car.

"Can I stay at your place tonight?" Lavi asked suddenly, turning the radio down. I shot him a look out of the corner of my eye. We were only a block away from his house now.

"Does it have to do with the Bookman?" I asked, slowing down as a late night couple hurried across the crosswalk.

I saw a half smile quirk his lips. "You read me too well. Yeah, I don't really feeling like facing the old man."

"Slacker," I glanced out the side mirror in order to hide my own half smile.

"Hey! Says who?! I do my work, everything's always turned in on time!" Lavi twisted in his seat, his face in full pout mood.

I held up my hand, using my fingers to count, "Except for that one time, and that time, oh and then there was-"

"Alright, alright, alright, I get it." He turned around. "But seriously, can I?"

I mentally sighed. I let him stay and I was going to be in for a late night. I kicked him out of the car and I'd feel guilty of making him face whatever it was he was going to face.

"Fine, but when I say I'm going to bed you better shut the hell up," I growled, driving past his apartment. I saw Lavi shoot a quick glance at the building, tensing up until we'd driven out of sight.

"Thanks Kanda," he muttered as we got out. I pretended to ignore him as I stalked toward the lobby, turning a deaf ear as he yelled for me to wait. "Jeeze, it's not going to kill you to wait five seconds for me to catch up," he said, pretending to be out of breath when he finally caught up to me.

"Che. That's five seconds more I have to be in your presence," I said, pushing the up button.

"Eh? Yu" - I held up the rabbit threateningly – "you don't to be so cold," he pouted as we stepped into the elevator. I sighed, closing my eyes and leaning against the mirrored walls as we rode up to floor eleven. There were only three other flats beside mine on the floor - out of them I was the only full time tenant – so I had it relatively to myself. It was nice not to put up with rambunctious neighbors when I wanted to meditate. Then of course there was always _that_ old man calling and sobbing over the phone, along with the occasional unwanted visit from Usagi or one of my adoptive brothers.

Lavi followed me quietly into the flat. I tried to keep my frown from deepening, but it was hard with him acting so out of character. I had all my sharp remarks lined up on the tip of my tongue and here Lavi was doing nothing. Che.

"Are my stuff from last time still here?" he asked, taking a seat on the sofa. I moved toward the kitchen after hesitating for a moment.

"Yeah, all where you left them." I grabbed two beers before joining him back in the living room.

Lavi nodded his thanks as he took the already opened can. We raised the cans in a silent cheers and took a swig. "That hits the spot. A nice light beer from" – he paused glancing at the label – "your drinking German beer now?" I saw the mild curiosity in his eye, pleased to see he was coming around finally.

"Tch, so what if I am?" I took another swig, letting the light fizzy taste roll over my tongue before swallowing. After awhile, I began to relax. Lavi wasn't doing anything stupid, just sitting there uncharacteristically silent, drinking away. There had been a few times in the past when I'd seen him like this – once when Allen disappeared for a month, when Lenalee injured her legs, and occasionally after meetings with Bookman. As different as it was for Lavi, it was oddly comfortable. More real in away.

"I hardly ever see you with your hair down," Lavi commented idly, leaning back against the sofa. He pulled down his bandana, as if to emphasize 'letting your hair down'.

"It gets in the way," I muttered, resting my head back too. Today was starting to catch up with me, I could feel the headache forming.

I hadn't realized I'd closed my eyes until I felt something tugging at my hair. Instantly my body went tense and I was about to spring away –

"Sorry, just try to relax." Lavi's voice murmured in my ear as slipped the hair tie out. Slowly, under Lavi's working fingers, I began to relax, leaning back. I felt him sift on the sofa, bringing his legs under him so he could apply more pressure on my tense muscles.

"Ah…" I winced, jerking away from him when he pressed rather painfully above my shoulder blade.

"Sorry, sorry…" Lavi chuckled a little, "It would be easier if you weren't leaning back into the couch ya know." I left out a breath, shifting around until my back was facing him. "There we go!"

Once again Lavi's hands began to smooth out all the tense, knotted muscles, working out all the kinks I'd gotten from practicing. My mind began to drift, jumping from fighting techniques to memories.

Images of Lavi's happy, brilliant smile flashed across my closed eyelids. As he continued to work, I remembered times we'd spent skipping school, hanging out in the dusty bookstore, in his attic, the park, anywhere we thought we wouldn't get caught… The times I'd found him sleeping on the floor, head cushioned on books he'd been translating, or just plain napping in the middle of class. The way he had leaned against the walking bridge in the park during the New Year's celebration, despite the cold he'd been perfectly fine in just a ski jacket and jeans. How the fireworks had lit up his eye, giving new light to the sparkle he always had. And when he turned to look at me, that smile lighting up his face in away the fireworks, the sun, nothing could.

"Does that feel better?" Lavi's voice sounded in my ear, his breath tickling the curve. I jerked away, feeling my face flush. "Kanda?"

I turned away, clenching my jaw. "I'm going to bed. I'll set up a mattress if you want to use the bathroom first. You should be able to find everything in there – nothings moved." I didn't wait for an answer, just stormed over to my room. Maybe slamming the door behind me was a little harsh.

I stood poised next to the door until I heard the bathroom door click shut. Groaning, I leaned back, letting my head hit the door rather hard. Damn it, just damn it. I wasn't sure how much longer I could last. Having Lavi massage my back like that had brought up a topic I wasn't quite ready to breach with myself.

"Kanda, where'd you put my toothbrush! You know the one with strawberry's and bunnies?"

I sighed, pushing away from the door to go get the mattress, yelling over my shoulder as I went. "Same place, dumbass. Top drawer!"

Some things never change.

* * *

*Kanda's Car: In the last chapter I never said anything about what kind of car. It was just "the car". I'd really a name to the car, so if you have any ideas please let me know. Something sporty, yet still classical? All I could think of was Mustangs and Hondas…

OH YEA! About the whole DDR scene, I don't know really. It just popped into my mind and I started thinking: 'I bet Kanda's a secret DDR lover. I bet he's really good at it' *evil thoughs* So that's where that came from.

And yes, I did my research – drinking age in Canada (where the story takes place) is 18. So I'm going to put Kanda's and Lavi's ages at around 19-20ish? Sound good? I mean they are in a university after all… Do the math to figure out everyone else's ages (or just use Wiki).

**A/N**: Meh, I'm not very pleased with this chapter at all. For some reason I just couldn't get into Kanda's point of view. T_T Personally, it felt rushed and just not well put together, but I dunno. What do you all think? There may be a few other characters introduced later (Tyki for sure, along with Daisya, Noise Marie, and Miranda – I just love her clumsiness!), are there any that you _just have to see_? As always, please review, comment, critique, but please _no flaming_ ---for the record I haven't edit this yet, its late and I don't feel like doing it. So please point out any mistakes!

Nakemiin, Blue


	3. Chapter 3

**Disclaimer: **I do not, in any way, shape or form, own any of the characters, places, things mentioned in this story. DGM belongs to Katsura Hoshino, all rights reserved.

C – H – A – P – T – E – R

T- H - R - E - E

(Lavi's POV)

I woke up feeling oddly comfortable and for the first time in weeks, refreshed. I stretched slightly, then quickly curled up when my toes peeked out from under the blanket, meeting the cold air. Bringing the blanket up over my head I caught a whiff of lavender laundry detergent. Strange, last time I'd checked I'd been using unscented…

I sat up, throwing the blanket off, staring wildly around the room that was very much not mine. I took in the mirrored closet doors – one slightly open showing neatly hung dark clothes. The neat desk, text books perfectly stacked and neatly made bed, made it look like no one ever lived in the room. My eyes finally fell on the painting of a lotus in a hourglass; everything came rushing back. I fell back on the inflatable mattress, sighing in relief that I hadn't gotten drunk and woken up in some stranger's room (it had happened a few times in the past).

Just as quickly as the relief had set in, I sat back up, panic flaring in me again. If this was Kanda's room, where was he? I pushed the blankets away, scrambling to get untangled. Right as I managed to untangle myself, the door banged open and Kanda walked in looking pissed as usual. He stopped, blinking as he took in the sight of me half crouched on the floor, my blankets and sheets spread out everywhere.

"Che." He leaned against the door frame, smirking slightly. "Still sleeping as weird as usual."

I blushed slightly, looking down at the light wood floor, to avoid looking at that amazing body. Did he have any idea what walking around in his black boxers and tank top did to my heart? And the way he leaned against the frame, that perfectly white tank top riding up on his stomach, showing those well defined abs and that dark trail of hair going down from his lower stomach to disappear under his boxers…

"Eheh, I guess I do sleep weird, don't I?" I said rubbing the back of my head, getting up. "Where'd you go so early?"

Kanda glared, crossing his arms, "It's not early. You slept in, baka."

Eh, slept in? I was pretty good at waking up at seven or eight on weekends... "What's the time then?" I asked.

"Eleven." My eye widened; eleven?! I'd never slept in that late – well unless you counted the day after Graduation… "Che, get dressed. You want cream in your coffee?"

Kanda didn't wait for an answer; already down the hall his hair swinging around like a shining black curtain. It wasn't until I could hear him moving around the kitchen that I realized he had left his hair loose. Maybe he was thinking about my words yesterday? About to follow Kanda, I remembered his words. I frowned, leaning down to pick up the blankets – Kanda wasn't per say _dressed_ either, so why was he commanding me to get dressed? Ah but then again, Kanda was used to the frigidness of his apartment (which was always much colder then mine on the days I paid the heating bills late).

Of course I used it as an excuse to raid Kanda's closet. At first I was stunned at the sight of all the black and dark blue. How was it possible one could own so much dark colored clothes? Well it was Kanda after all… Rummaging around I found something that was totally out of place among the stylish shirts and sweaters. Kanda's last years Kendo tournament sweatshirt hung in the very back of the closet, almost obscured by several long winter coats. I'd only seen him wear it once, when his team captain had forced him into it after they'd won the tournament.

Smiling at the memory of the disgruntled Kanda, I slid on the sweatshirt. The inside was still soft, not matted down from time and washings. Even so, it still had the distinct scent of Kanda's laundry detergent – lavender and jasmine.

"Tch, took you long enough," Kanda said when I entered the main room. His eyes fell on the Japanese characters decorating the front, his gaze lingering for a moment before he looked away, narrowing his eyes. He was probably remembering all the sweet memories with it too. I walked up to him and accepted the mug of coffee he offered. The blissful aroma of perfectly blended black coffee with a spoonful of sugar and creamer rose up, tingling my senses.

I took a sip, letting the amazing taste – nutty, slightly bitter with a smidge of – "Eh?! Is this Lenalee's blend?" I had to take another sip just to make sure. Sure enough, almost hidden behind the strong taste of coffee beans, was that special _something_ Lenalee used. No matter how much I begged and bribed I'd never figured out what she used to give her coffee that amazing taste.

Pouting I warmed my hands with the cup. "Since when is she giving you her blend? I want some too!"  
Kanda snorted, almost rolling his eyes as he moved around the island.

"Since you started randomly showing up at my place, complaining that you were thirsty and bored," Kanda said, searching the cupboards.

Oh, well that explained things… "Wait – does that mean you actually care?! Oh you-" I started to get up ready to launch myself at Kanda/

Kanda gave me a death glare, setting down his cup of green tea. "Do you really want that rabbit stuffed down your throat that bad? All you had to do was _ask_." He pointed at the giant stuffed rabbit sitting on the floor by the couch. I blinked; I didn't remember him bringing it in last night.

As Kanda continued his search, I started to think. This morning Kanda was acting – well very un-Kanda like. Usually he'd kick me until I got up, throw my clothes at me and give five minutes to get dressed and out of his apartment. Then I'd stand outside his door, whining and banging on the door, half dressed, until he opened the door and reluctantly let me in. Kanda would sit on the couch, ignoring me yelling that he had _nothing_ to eat, calmly sipping his tea. This Kanda making me coffee, letting me wear his clothes (not that he really had a choice there), and actually being calm was…nice? Peaceful. I was able to just sit, enjoying being with Kanda and admire that strong back.

I winced dragging my thoughts away from Kanda. I needed something that would keep me from getting up and embracing Kanda from the back – ah TV! The beauty about Kanda's flat was that there was a TV in almost every room. A large plasma TV in the living room, a smaller one in both the kitchen and bathroom and a hideaway plasma in Kanda's bedroom.

Halfheartedly flipping through the channels, I went past countless sports, dramas, movies, cartoons, news until a familiar form caught my eye. I paused for a second, before clicking back. Sure enough – Daisya Barry, one of Kanda's adopted brothers, made a spectacular goal. Just as he turned the image switched, going to the real life Daisya sitting on a very comfortable (yet never really were) orange arm chair, his spur of the moment purple dyed hair clashing horribly with the color.

"So how do you feel, Daisya, after scoring the winning goal against USA Maine?" the interviewer was asking.

"Well I dunno… I guess it felt pretty good, but in reality it was the whole team you know." Kanda's head snapped up toward the TV, shock registering in his eyes for a brief moment. When he saw Daisya's face he growled, eyes narrowing.

"Didn't you score half of the goals anyways?"

Daisya shrugged, looking sheepish. "I guess."

"Is there anyone in particular you'd like to thank for their support? Coaches? Family members? Friends? A special _someone_?"

Daisya laughed – echoing Kanda's and my snort. Daisya's special 'someone' was any girl who he could get onto his lap for more than a minute. "Well of course I'm gonna thank my team, you guys are awesome. 'Specialy our goalie. And the coaches for making us all play together. But I'd really like to thank my family. The old man who gave me my first real ball, and my brothers, Kanda and Marie. Marie – thanks for letting me shoot on you. Kanda – because of you chasing me threatening to kill me, wind sprints are nothing." He laughed again, and then a devious grin spread across his face, very similar to the one I wore when I was ready to make trouble. "And Ka-n-da, if you are watching, which you probably are because of the old man, go. Get. Laid!"

My eye widened and I really did gape. A second later, I yelped scrambling backward from the shattered mug and glass. The TV spluttered and smoked, sparks flying from the hole in the screen from where Kanda hand thrown his cup. His fury was so thick it was almost tangible, growing around him in a dark aura.

"That…baka… when I get my hands on him…" Kanda's hands clenched and unclenched, twitching to grasp Mugen and murder Daisya in the most horrible way. I sat frozen in fear that if I moved or spoke, Kanda would take out his anger on me.

The phone rang. I yelped again, startled by the sudden ringing. Kanda stormed over, yanking the phone of its stand and snarling into the receiver. "What?!"

"Kanda! Did you see? On the news our Daiysa was being interviewed!" Kanda's adopted father's voice came out, high pitch with excitement. Several veins in Kanda's forehead began to throb a sure sign he really was going to destroy something. I began to edge away out of rang of Kanda.

"Oh I saw alright…I'm going to fucking _kill_ him. Nice and slow, making him plead for mercy." I shuddered at the bloodlust look in his eyes; I prayed that Daiysa would be smart enough to stay away for a long time. Kanda hung up halfway through Teidoll's rambling about brotherly love and how wonderful it was that Daiysa was on TB. He was still shakinging from anger, the aura around him getting darker and darker.

Slowly I cleared my throat, bringing the burning eyes to me. "What?!" he snapped.

I laughed nervously, running a hand through my hair. "So…how 'bout some pancakes for breakfast?"

* * *

Whistling a random tune I walked toward my apartment, stomach full of coffee and pancakes. Kanda had been so out of it with shock and anger from Daiysa's TV announcement he hadn't realized he was eating pancakes until he was done, the sugary syrup dripping down his chin. Kanda had muttered threats and retreated to the bathroom, where he locked himself in for a good half an hour while I cleaned up the dishes. When he finally came out he'd visibly calmed down, though his eyes were still hard and cold.

My whistling faltered slightly when I faced my apartment. Waiting for me on the fifth floor, third door down from the stairs, room 49 would be Bookman's report or if my luck had run out – the Bookman himself. Hoisting my smile back on my face, I sauntered forward, heading toward the mailboxes to pick up yesterday's mail.

"Oi, Lavi!" I froze, closing my eyes and praying that old cranky sounding voice did not belong to the person I thought it did. Slowly I turned around, praying to every Roman god I could think of…

"Oh g' afternoon," I smiled, letting out a mental sigh. My landlord frowned, tugging his long flannel bathrobe tighter around him. Honestly this man's fashion made me laugh – borrowing his wife's bunny slippers, bathrobe in the afternoon and a Santa hat?!

"Could I talk ta ya for a moment?" he asked, squinting at me. I nodded, trusting my hands deep in my pockets and following him to his office. He sank down on his old office chair, sighing deeply. "Take a seat, take a seat," he motioned for me to take the spindly looking stool in front of his desk. I sat down gingerly, tensing as I felt it wobble.

I waited for him to speak but all he did was stare at a pile of papers, almost like he'd forgotten I was there. "Uh..sir? You had something to tell me?"

He blinked and straightened his robe. "Right! Well, Lavi, it's got to do with your payin' habits. Honestly-"

I quickly interrupted him, "Please sir, I'm really sorry if I forgot to pay something again! I'll get the money to you right away, heck I'll even pay a late fee or something! But please don't kick me out!" I knew I sounded pretty pitiful but it was the truth. I lost my apartment and there was nowhere for me to go. Bookman refused to take me in after I had decided I was moving out; Kanda would never take me in; Lenalee would love to but Komui would refuse and Allen might but he'd be afraid of Cross… So in short I'd be stranded on the streets.

"Lavi, you haven't forgotten to pay anythin'. It's the fact that your payin' late that I can't do any more. I'm giving ya fare warnin' now, the next pay day is in three weeks. Ya pay your bills late again, and I'll be forced to kick ya out. I can't be having a tenant who is forgettin' to pay – it sets a bad example. Do what ya have to do, but don't forget to pay. I'll send ya a week's notice when the time comes." He leaned back in his chair, searching through his drawers for his pipe. I pointed to the top of his old monitor where the cherry wood pipe rested. He nodded his thanks, picking it up and starting to polish it with a piece of his bathrobe.

"I won't forget this time, I really won't," I bowed my head, clasping my hands in front of me. It almost like I was bowing the Japanese way except that I was sitting.

"Well that's it Lavi. I'll see you again," he gave me a wave, dismissing me. I got up quickly, leaving the dusty office as quick as I could.

Juggling the stack of mail, I opened my apartment door, nervousness bubbling in me. I'd barely gotten the door closed and had set the mail down on the small table when I saw a blur of moment. A second later my head crashed back against the door from the force of the blow.

"_Idiot!_" Another blow to my face, this time with a small fist.

"Oi! Gramps! Ouch, stop-" the Bookman's fist connected with my mouth, effectively shutting me up. The old man moved away, releasing the front of my shirt as he stared down at me with cold angry eyes. I slowly got up, touching my mouth with the back of my hand, wincing at the pain. When I pulled it back, my hand came away glistening with blood from my split lip. For a man entering his seventies, he had a mean right hook.

Bookman didn't wait for me to speak; he marched into the main room serving as my kitchen and living room, his hair standing straight up and not moving (he really did use to much hair spray and jell) as he walked. I slowly followed, rubbing the back of my head. He sat down on my old couch I'd gotten off the side of the road (hey it had a 'free' sign on it), glaring at me as he tucked his hands into his robe. "Sit."

I took the seat opposite him, my gaze focusing on his collar, rather than looking him in the eye. Neither of us moved for a long time, until suddenly Bookman let out a tired sigh and shoved a notebook across the table. He flipped open to the halfway mark. "Would you like to explain this?"

Explain what? Was what I wanted to ask. Instead I looked down at the pages, recognizing my tiny slanting handwriting – oh it was my logs. I noticed where his metal tipped finger was pointing. So he'd noticed. "I spilt some coffee on it, had to tear out the pages." Hoping behind hope that he'd buy the lie…

"Bullshit. Lavi I'm the one who trained you. Do you really think I wouldn't notice the way you tried to make it look as if the pages weren't missing?" I gulped, glancing down at the pages again, suddenly interested in the words rather than meeting Bookman's accusing glare.

"It...was nothing," I fixed a smile on my face – I was beginning to hate smiling – and forced myself to look Bookman straight in the eye. For a moment I thought he was going to believe me. Then a blinding blow to the top of my head told me otherwise. Rubbing the spot he'd just hit, I glared at him through watering eyes.

"Jeeze what was that for?! It's true, I just spilt some coffee – you know how I'm addicted to it! The pages got ruined. I redid them – I don't have photographic memory for nothing – so it shouldn't be a problem!" I tried to keep myself calm like Bookman had taught me – tried to keep the anger and bitterness out of my voice. Still it leaked in through my last words, causing the words to hang in the air.

Bookman stared at me with an unreadable expression. "Your logs would have a feint smell of coffee then." Everything froze; my eye widened slightly as I stared at him, unable to speak. "Lavi…"

I looked away, once again unable to face him. "I…it became too personal. I had to redo it. I just began to write how much fun I had with Allen and Lenalee… I wasn't seeing it write. I'm sorry." It still wasn't the full truth, but it wasn't a complete lie either. That day I'd realized something about Kanda… gotten too attached to the moment.

Bookman stood abruptly, his face darkening. "You're slipping up too much, _Lavi_."

My head whipped up in time to see Bookman pull a cloth roll out of his robe. I _knew_ that roll; it only brought pain and memories I wish I could forget, but because of _Bookman_ I couldn't.

"No…" I whimpered, getting up and moving as far away from Bookman as I could in the small apartment, " No please don't… No…" I began to tremble as he unrolled it, exposing the black needles he used for acupuncture. "Please, Gramps…Jiji…Bookman, please." My legs began to tremble and soon gave out. I fell to the ground, completely broken, _Lavi_ falling away. "Please _don't_. I won't slip up, _I won't just not the nee-_" I screamed. My left arm went numb, Bookman's needle protruding from a pressure point.

'_Hey Lavi, did you know that Allen won the math tournament? We should throw a party for him, don't you think? It's amazing, he was always getting such bad grades on his tests and suddenly he won the national completion!'_ Lenalee's voice cut through, her smiling face lighting up.

"No…" I screamed again as I felt another needle join the second. This one sent burning fire through my veins.

'_Che, baka, going and tripping on your own shoelace. Only idiots do that- oh wait, I nearly forgot, you are an idiot. Tch, get off me! Don't cry all over me just 'cause you can't keep your balance._' Kanda… Damn it, I didn't need his voice now.

I closed my eyes, trying to forget, trying to shut myself down. This time I felt Bookman's fist smash into my face. I tasted more blood in my mouth, causing my stomach to heave. I felt a stabbing pain in my right hand and then in my leg. "No…" I moaned, pain wracking my body. Another punch to my stomach…

_Hey Lavi, what do you think I should get Lenalee for Christmas? I want to get her something worthwhile, but not something to expensive. I was thinking books – she's always reading one of those romance novels. I was also thinking of making her something but what? Oh do you think she'd like it if I record all favorite songs on the piano? _Allen? No… his face was blurring. I couldn't tell any more.

More faces appeared – Cross, Komui, was that Marie? No Miranda… More and more faces, voices, shapes, everything was blurring together, pressing in closer. Why couldn't they just leave me alone? I wanted to scream – was I screaming? – to cut the faces, tell them to leave me alone. They were nothing, I shouldn't be caring, yet-

I was forgetting. Someone's face, she looked young, kind and motherly was smiling, shoved aside by an angry face. I felt as if I should know them, like they were important… The pain and hurt was taking over. I wasn't aware of falling, but then I was staring at the wood floor, darkening with something. I felt as if I should be worried about the red smears but I just couldn't bring myself to care…

"Don't forget Lavi, you aren't like them. Don't get attached," a voice was fading along with my consciousness. "Remember who you are, remember what you are."

I let my eye close, finally letting it all fade…

* * *

*For the record because this story takes place in _Canada_ soccer (which is the sport Daisya was playing) will be known as _football_.

*Daisya's line "Kanda get laid" came from my mind when sleep deprived. I was trying to figure out how I could include Daisya (I love him – not just because he plays football) when _that _popped into my mind. Admit it – you laughed.

**A/N:** Holy shit! Is this a cliffhanger?! Nah, I think naught, but that's only because I know what's going to happen next…….. *evil laugh* That chapter was slightly longer than the others, and so difficult to write! 'Specially the end… Lavi's encounter with Bookman. _ I hope it sort of starts to explain Lavi's lack of sleep and such… It will all come clear very soon (smile). I'll try to answer any questions you still have (or are going to have) without giving too much away. One thing I will say though – is I'm not really sure if Lavi is going to have personas… However there is going to be a "Lavi" – the one most people see – and then a "Real" – that comes later – and a "_Lavi" _– again later – so in a way he sort of does still have his personas. *sweat drop* Well comments, hate it love it, critics and corrections are always welcome. I may a point of answering everyone.

Thanks and hope to see you soon (this story is going a lot faster than I thought in the beginning…)

~Blue


	4. Chapter 4

**Disclaimer:** I do not own -man nor any other products/companies/etc mentioned in this story. It is called a fanfic for a _reason_.

--To lesson confusion: This is still from Lavi's POV – it is him waking up after the happenings of ch. 3. Pay attention to breaks with "POV" in them. It signifies a change ;) –

**!!----- Who has read the latest DGM chapter?! -------!!**

C – H – A – P – T – E – R

F – O – U – R

(Lavi's POV)

My head felt fuzzy, heavy, my body wasn't responding. As I tried to move a billion pins and needles erupted from every nerve in my body, searing white hot pain raced down and up my spine, causing my head to feel like it was going to split open.

Maybe trying to move when you just woke up wasn't the best idea.

I slowly tried to crack my eye open – but it only caused more pain and nausea. Alright then, opening eye was a bad idea too. Which led me to think… what the hell had I done to get in this situation?! What had happened?! Something about warning… then… then… then…

Bookman.

I tried to groan but my throat was too parched. Wincing, I had to do something about this. I couldn't just lay here on the ground all day. I took a deep breath through my nose – my jaw not functioning enough to open. I could taste something metallic and bitter in my mouth, most likely dried blood, a not to pleasant taste to wake up too.

After a while of struggling and mentally cursing my aching head and body, I finally got my eye open. The wood floor (that would explain why I was so uncomfortable) swam in and out of focus, red growing and then disappearing as the floor lurched around. Red… Was that blood too? I gave up trying to keep my eye open and collapsed again.

Damn, I had nothing left in me. As my head began to pound, feeling like any second the next pulse would sent it into millions of pieces, I began to fade again. Being conscious took too much effort…

_A sullen kid sat on a hard wooden chair, fiery red hair sticking out in every direction, refusing to be tamed. Hard anger glittered dangerously in his green eye visible under the mop of red. The bruise forming on his jaw and the scrapes along his face and hands told the reason why he was sitting in the principal's office, swinging his feet for they were unable to reach the ground. _

_ "Lavi, this is the third fight you've gotten into in the past week, care to explain?" a quiet voice sounded from across the desk. Lavi narrowed his eyes, glaring at the table refusing to look. "Lavi, it isn't like you to fight. Please tell me…" _

_ "He…" the rest of his sentence was mumbled as Lavi glared fiercer at the patch of sunlight illuminating a picture of the principal and some celebrity._

_ "He what? I can't understand you if you mumble."_

_ "He called Yu-chan a faggot! He said he was weak and girly and shouldn't be here because his parents left him! He insulted Yu-chan! Why-" the child Lavi began to sob uncontrollably. "WHY ISN'T HE IN HERE! HE'S THE ONE WHO STARTED IT! WHY?!" Lavi jumped up, knocking the picture of the desk along with papers. "I HATE HIM! I HATE THEM! THEY DON'T UNDERSTAND!"_

_ Lavi sank down, only the top of his head showing over the desk. The principal sighed, leaning back in his chair, his face falling farther into the shadows. "Lavi, you are just a kid. They don't realize what they are saying… Ignore them, alright?" Lavi hiccupped, his glare watery now. "Go to the nurse and have her treat those cuts, then get back to class."_

_ "What about-"_

_ "He's going to be in trouble too," the principal's smile was evident in his voice. "From now on let me handle him, okay?" _

_ "Fighting again, Lavi?" the young adolescent ignored the older man, applying ice to the bruise on his cheek. "Who was it with this time?"_

_ "Who do you think?" Lavi turned, untying his eye patch. Another bruise was forming, causing ugly rising to his scar. _

_ Bookman sat down, his expression unreadable. "About that boy again?"_

_ "His name is Kanda," Lavi spat out, throwing the warm ice pack on the table in his momentary anger. His glare softened slightly as he ran a finger along the bruise. "Yeah, it was about him again."_

_ "Lavi-"_

_ "I know. Don't get attached. But I can't help it, _he's my friend, _Gramps. I can't just sit by and watch my friend get ganged up on six to one."_

_ "I was going to say, you ungrateful brat, that maybe Kanda didn't want your help? He's a strong boy, prideful too. He can take care of himself." Bookman picked up the icepack, holding it back out. _

_ "Kanda would have gotten beaten into a pulp!" Lavi ignored the icepack, shock radiating from his single eye. "I can't just leave him!"_

_ Bookman sighed, sitting down and dropping the ice pack. It lay disregarded by both between them. "Do what you, Lavi. Just don't come running to me when you take too big of a bite." He watched Lavi walk out of the room, a slight limp. The moment the boy was out of the room he let his careful mask slip, showing the concern and love he felt for the boy appear. Perhaps letting the boy go to public school hadn't been the best idea – but he need experience. He need to taste betrayal and friendship first hand, life experiences like that couldn't be taught through books. _

_ A group of teenagers lay in the soft grass, watching the blue sky above them. Occasionally one would lift a hand and point at a cloud, mumbling about how it looked like some strange animal. _

_ "I see a plate of dango," Allen mumbled, letting his hand slowly raise and point out the fluffy cloud._

_ "Everything you've said so far has been food!" Lenalee laughed, nudging him with her elbow._

_ "Che, stupid Moyashi. Trust his brain to be where his stomach is," Kanda grumbled, shifting slightly so his pony tail wasn't digging into the back of his head. Quick fingers worked the tie out, dangling it above his face._

_ "Better, ne?" Lavi asked, his face splitting into a grin. Both his and Kanda's were in between that of a child's and that of a man's; Lavi's face becoming more defined, the jaw strengthening, while Kanda's became more delicate, the high cheekbones complimented by his raven black hair. _

_ "Che, I see a usagi being killed," Kanda glared, pointing at a blob. Lavi cried out, pretending to look offended. The group fell into laughter, Kanda even permitting a rare smile to grace his lips. _

_ "I wish every day could be as beautiful as this," Lavi sighed, resting his head on Kanda's stomach. _

_ "Get off my baka," Kanda growled, lifting his head slightly to see the mess of red. Lavi grinned, but when Kanda made no move to push him off he settled back, pulling down his bandana to let his hair fall into his face. A soft breeze blew by, stirring the group's hair and clothes, almost as if the world was making a delayed reply to Lavi's comment. It was a beautiful day._

_ "Ah look! Doesn't that one look like ge ge's* robots?" Lenalee asked, her finger tracing another cloud. Shudders went around, everyone glancing fugitively around to make sure the experiments from hell weren't around. _

_ "No I think it looks more like a demented unicorn," Lavi commented, shifting on Kanda's stomach, causing another glare and a halfhearted hit to the head._

_ "If you are going to use me as a pillow, _don't move!_" he growled out, raising his hand to knock on Lovi's head again. _

_ "Aw, Yu-chan!" Lavi twisted around, trying to give Kanda an awkward hug. However he was faced with Mugen's gleaming blade. A moment later, Allen and Lenalee watched amused as Kanda chased Lavi around and around the park, the blade swishing through the air each time Kanda missed. Lavi's maniacal laughter rang through the air along with Kanda's curses…_

(Kanda's POV)

Che. That idiot was late. Later than usual, that is. He always showed up in the morning 20 seconds after the agreed meeting time. But not today.. Today he was _five_ minutes late. I tried to hide my anger – and underneath that emotion I _was not_ feeling, worry – as the minutes passed by. At this rate we'd barely make it Lenalee and Allen's school by the time the first bell rang.

"Um… Kanda?" Lenalee spoke up, a little hesitant. "Shouldn't Lavi be here by now?" Moyashi perked up, narrowing his eyes as he glanced between us and then down the block toward Lavi's apartment.

"Che. That baka probably slept in. " I scowled and glanced at the cell phone I was clutching – but not repeatedly looking at – incase Lavi sent a message.

"Um should we call him? He might not even be up yet." I pretended not to notice the hard stare she was giving me. Unlike the naïve Moyashi, she knew something was up. When she'd called on Sunday morning after seeing Daisya's interview, she'd asked if Lavi knew. I'd been forced to tell her that Lavi had slept over. Yes she'd been shocked to find out I'd allowed Lavi to sleep over – especially after spending the whole day with him. She could see the way I was fighting to keep worry off my face (damn woman intuition), yet she didn't know the reason why I was so concerned.

Lavi had never called last night. I never told him to call – but he always did when he walked home, telling me he'd gotten home safe and what he'd seen on his brief walk. Over the years I'd realized how used to the calls I became, I came to a point where I could no longer relax unless he called. However the moment he called, I acted as if the calls were the most annoying thing in the world. So last night – I'd never received the call that allowed me to relax… and damn it _I was not worrying over him_!

"Tch. I'm going to call him," I flipped open my phone, holding down two. There were only eight numbers in my cell phone – all having a corresponding speed-dial. I held my breath waiting for him to pick up, his voice would be groggy, but he'd sound happy because he'd have seen that picture of me (when –and how- he'd taken – and with my hair down – I'd never know) and heard that stupid ring tone he insisted was "perfect" for me.

The phone clicked and I waited for that – "Hey~ This is the super-sexy-awesome-loveable-really-hot-like-fucking-hot-pirate-wanna-be-rabbit Lavi! Leave me a message and-"

I growled, shutting my phone with a snap. "Get in the fucking car." Two pairs of startled eyes stared at me. "Che, we're going to wake him up."

My fingers tightened against the steering wheel as I dove. To anyone else, it would look like I was furious at having to wake Lavi's lazy ass up (and a very large part of me was calling for his blood). "Stay here," I growled, slamming my door shut. I flipped through my keys – one for my car, my apartment, my locker at work, the locker at school, Tiedoll's place, Marie's small condo and finally the red key (it wasn't really that hard to find- it was _fucking _red) with a sticker of a very cartoonish rabbit on it. Lavi's sense of humor…

I was about to ring the bell when I heard the car door slam shut bellow. Glancing over the railing I watched irritated as Lenalee hurried over to the stairs and up to me. "I thought I told you to stay in the car."

Lenalee sent me a pout, ringing the door bell for me. "What if he's sick?! What if-" I shook my head, placing my hand over her mouth to silence her. Both of us waited for some sign of life from inside Lavi's apartment – a feint voice, a crash, _anything_… Using the red key I unlocked the door, shoving the door open and entering before Lenalee. Lavi's book bag lay against the wall, some of his books scattered, mixing with the mail that had spread across the floor. Tiny dots of reddish-brown on some of the papers made the knot in my stomach tighten. Lenalee tried to move past me, anxious in her quest to find Lavi, but I held out my arm, giving her a sharp shake of my head.

There was a dim light coming from the living room that I recognized as the old TV Lavi had gotten from one of his neighbors. There was a small beep, most likely Lavi's cell phone. So the baka was here…unless he'd forgotten his cell phone and was now slumped over in some alley unable to find his way back home… I forced the thoughts away, walking briskly toward living room.

The lights flickered, taking their time turning completely on. In a matter of seconds I took in the mess of books, papers, though none of it was in Lavi's normal "organized mess". Another few seconds of searching and him.

I spun around, stopping Lenalee from entering the room an seeing him, crumpled on the ground among the books, obviously hurt. Quickly I worked off my car key, placing it in her hand. "You and Moyashi take my car – if you fuck it up in any way, I'll kill Moyashi!"

"But what about- "

"He's sick. Really sick." I started to push the complaining Lenalee out of the door. "Probably got that swine flu or some kind of shit like it. If I have to take him somewhere I'll borrow Marie's car. Maybe take Lavi's." I didn't mention that Marie was most likely out of town and Lavi's car probably didn't have gas.

Lenalee wasn't convinced but she left, making me – no _forcing _– that I'd call or text if anything changed in Lavi's "well being". I closed the door in her face, cutting of her voice that was starting to give me a headache, locking it just in case she tried to get in.

Lavi's fiery hair was spread out around him, contrasting beautifully with the hard wood floor. I would have thought he was sleeping if not for the pained expression and the trail of blood trickling from his mouth and hair line. I took a deep breath, forcing my queasiness back and moved to crouch next to him.

"Lavi? Lavi can you hear me?" I called quietly, raising my hand and placing it on his head. Lavi's eyes twitched and a soft moan escaped his chapped lips. I got up, grabbing a blanket from under a pile of books, causing them to tumble and add more mess. Shoving more books off the couch, I spread the blanket across it before moving to Lavi's side again. Grunting with the effort to pick him up, I finally got him to rest on the couch. No longer on his stomach, I was able to examine his injuries; bruising along his face and neck, a shallow cut across his forehead, split lip and a possible dislocated shoulder. _What happened to you_? I wondered, carefully untying his eye patch. I'd never asked and he'd never explained where he'd lost his eye – it was something completely trivial to us.

"Che. Idiot, there's no way you can write this one off as 'falling down the stairs'," I muttered, getting up to find the first aid kit. From as long as I could remember there had been days when Lavi hadn't come to school- or had come with a black eye always with the excuse he fell or ran into something. The feint bruising around his neck in the shape of fingers told the truth.

After a good twenty minutes of searching his apartment I came up empty. "How the _hell_ do you find anything?!" I stormed back into the living room of doom, nearly tripping over a book.

"Yu…?" Lavi's broken dry voice came from the couch. "Is…that…Yu?" I hurried over to his side, trying to keep my heartbeat calm; though it didn't stop the butterflies erupting in my stomach.

"I'm here baka," I leaned over him so he wouldn't have to move. His eye was painfully swollen, only a small glimmer of the green showing.

"Yu…" he groaned, closing his eye. "Water."

I nodded, going to the kitchen to find him water. I held Lavi's head as he drank, watching as the bruises stretched every time he swallowed. "Easy…" Lavi slowed down, finally stopping and opened his eye again.

"Thanks, I felt like I was dying there," he said, sounding almost back to normal. My heart gave a painful squeeze as he tried to smile only to flinch in pain.

"Che, don't move. Where's you first aid kit? You do have one don't you baka?" I asked him, getting up to return his glass to the kitchen (which surprisingly was clean compared to the rest of the place).

"Under the sink, behind the cleaning stuff."

I rolled my eyes; of course he'd keep it in a weird place, instead somewhere normal like the _bathroom_. As I walked by the small island table I glanced at the pile of mail, catching sight of a note written on heavy parchment. Frowning, I paused, tilting my head to read the note.

_Lavi-_

_ Don't forget. You've got a month to sort it all out, mess up again and it's over._

_ B._

There was only person I could think of who went by a name with "B". Bookman. Which meant…

"Can't find it?" Lavi called, seeming to be getting impatient. I grabbed the paper stuffing it in my jacket pocket – Lavi was going to talk about this later.

"No, I found it." I sat down on the couch, gently pushing Lavi so I had room to work. "This may sting a little," I told him ripping open an alcohol wipe with my teeth. Lavi closed his eye, tensing as I dabbed lightly at the cuts. After years of bandaging all the injuries from my sports and playing with Daisya I'd learned how clean and bandage fairly well. Though I never managed mine to look as neat and perfect as Marie's.

"How bad do I look?" Lavi mumbled as I cleaned up the rest of his face.

"You want the truth?" I asked, pausing in my work.

He hesitated for a moment before saying slowly, "Truth…"

"Like hell."

Lavi flinched and chuckled darkly. "Damn, that bad? Heh…Ouch memo to self, don't laugh." I frowned, hating how he was managing to turn this into a joke. "Yu-chan, I never did ask, but why are you here?"

I got up, picking up the kit and returning it back to the kitchen. I found an icepack in the back of his fridge and wrapped it in dish towel. "You didn't call last night."

Lavi accepted the icepack gratefully, pressing it against his eye and sighing. "So you were worried. Aw, Yu-chan I love you too!"

I thanked kami that he couldn't see the light blush on my cheeks. He always went around saying things like that; did he ever really mean it or was it just "Lavi". "Che. Why would I be worried about a stupid usagi like you?"

He seemed to have forgotten his memo to self for he started laughing quietly. "I'll get you to admit it one day. Inside you are just one big teddy be-"

I put my hand over his mouth, irritated by his talk. "Lenalee was here earlier." Lavi froze, I could feel his jaw clench under my hand. "She didn't see you, but she was pretty worried. I wouldn't be surprised if she comes straight here after school." Lavi said nothing, probably trying to figure out what excuse would work. "Lavi…"

"Don't." He removed my hand, using it to help him sit up. "Don't say anything." I stared at him, surprised by the hard tone in his voice. He got to his feet unsteadily and walked toward the kitchen. I could only watch helplessly as he slammed his fist on the island, his whole body shaking.

"…Bookman…"

"What?" I asked, walking to his side.

"You…you didn't see Bookman when you came…did you?" Lavi looked up, his bruised face fearful. My hand clenched around the paper in my coat.

"No…" Shit, what the hell was I to do? Something was up- and Lavi wasn't letting me in. He went around avoiding me, avoiding my eyes, always changing the subject when it got to close to him…to us.

He was nodding slowly, mumbling something. "Good…that's good…Worse…"

"Lavi." He looked up, his eye fixing on a spot just above my eyebrow. Fuck… "What's this all about? Why'd Bookman hit you?" I drew out the paper, shoving it under his nose. "I swear, Lavi, I'm going to find out."

He stared at the paper, eye widening slightly, before he looked up a leer twisting his face. "I messed up, there are three strikes right? I messed up twice, but this time I'll score. I'm not going to mess up any more. Not any more…"

* * *

_Your insecurities are concealed by your pride,_

_Pretty soon your ego will kill what's left inside,_

_Just as beautiful as you are,_

_It's so pitiful what you are,_

_Should have seen it coming,_

_All along…_

_Beautiful_ – 10 Years

. . . Er _what_? You waited weeks, for this?! Yeah. (BTW- not edited yet)

Before I get people flipping out on me, let me explain. Bookman's "Noahishness" as I've seen it described, is just how I've always viewed him. I'm sorry. Honestly I've always found Bookman creepy, cruel, and brutal, 'specially after Lavi's "dream" where he was trapped by Road. So you don't like it, I don't care. End of story.

Second – the whole italicized part? Memories. I think everyone figured that out, but I just wanted to clearify. They start with Lavi being around seven-nine? I don't really know. The next one would be him around 12-14ish, the last one 15-17ish. Something like that. There's a point to the memories I swear- I'm just not ready to tell you ;)

So anyways, comment, critique (we all know I need it), muse, give me ideas whatever… Just don't flame it. T_T I find that annoying (so far everyone is very nice and I haven't had the fire alarm go off yet). BTW- the song? Great song, _GREAT_ band. Their music is very pretty. I've gotten some of my muse from their songs on several occasions…

**_SORRY ABOUT THE LONG UPDATE!!! *bows* _I've been busy with exams and such... And writing my Original story (links can be found on my profile, or on my deviant..which is also on my profile). If you are ever wondering where the hell I am, check deviantart, for I update there more often. Sorry. **

-Blue-

_Next Update:_ When I get a damn chance!


End file.
